In everyone’s life, there are those events which impact your world on a very serious level. It is during this time that one tends to discover their inner strengths and weaknesses.
I was sick. Although I had no idea exactly how sick I was, I knew I needed to go to the E.R. one Sunday. Off I went.
What happened next threw my whole world into chaos and uncertainly.
Not only was something wrong with my gallbladder, but something even more serious with my heart. The docs couldn’t remove my gallbladder until they could stabilize my heart and that was proving to be a challenge.
For nearly 2 weeks I alternated between regular room and I.C.U. as the docs tried to figure out how to resolve the heart issues while trying to calm my gallbladder.
Endless nuclear tests were done…blood work done…meds were given and often switched around to see which one would respond more effectively. I was also given a cardiac conversion (which zapped my heart back regular for the most part).
Twice I was over medicated, which left me struggling in limbo (I can tell you that as a psychic medium I much rather prefer to communicate with the dead from this side instead of a direct face to face with them LOL!).
Finally the day came that my gallbladder (though only functioning at 7 %) calmed down and I could eat small amounts of food and my heart seemed to have responded to some meds.
The decision was made for me to go home for a few weeks and get stronger (I had gotten weaker in the hospital and had lost weight), then head up to Miami for gallbladder surgery at Mount Sinai (their cardiac team is one of the best).
I found myself emotional twice that day I came home. Once in the car (I choked back tears as my husband and I left the hospital), then again as I sat in my bathtub. The motions were raw and powerful. I felt vulnerable.
I took a few days to reflect upon my experience and to see if I had any anger.
I learned I didn’t have anger as much as I did disappointment. I didn’t feel like I was included with the medical decisions (to be fair, my regular docs made sure to keep me posted and talk to me as best as they could, though the same cannot be said fr the rest).
As I reflected, it occurred to me that I could be bitter about my experience but I am choosing not to be.
I am choosing to look back upon this as a learning experience for everyone involved. Everyone learned something from this. Hands down. Full stop.
As with any and all learning experiences, this is a positive experience overall.
I’m still alive and for that I am grateful.